The Demon Bunnies of Snow Cap Galaxy
by AnarchistV
Summary: A fanfiction set in the amazing world of Super Mario Galaxy, it details the backstory behind the bunnies of Snow Cap Galaxy. It's a little gory, but how else can you explain cute bunnies killing you for failing a mission!
1. Prologue

**The Demon Bunnies of Snow Cap Galaxy**

Prologue (History of the World)

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far, away, called Snow Cap Galaxy, there was a single planet covered in snow. On that planet, there lived three bunnies. Now, bunnies are notorious for reproducing in ridiculous numbers, but the planet's continuous winter climate and small size did not allow many plants to grow, and thus the bunnies' numbers dwindled until there were three left. To cope with this lack of food, the bunnies acquired a new taste….


	2. Famine Frenzy

Chapter 1 (Famine Frenzy)

"I'm hungry!" whined Leslie, the bunny. "We haven't had anything to eat on this godforsaken planet for months."

"Yeah," complained Kim. "Whatever happened to all those Star Bits that were floating around?"

Todd, leader of the bunny pack, was busily munching on the rabbits' Star Bit horde. When he heard them complaining, he hastily buried the Star Bits in the snow and came right over.

"Fear not, my friends," he said. "I'm sure that food will fall out of the sky any day now!"

"That's what you always say," snapped Leslie.

"If we don't get food soon," threatened Kim. "We're going to munch on YOU!"

"You can't do that…" stuttered Todd.

"Why not?" asked the two bunnies simultaneously.

"Because…" Todd replied nervously. "Who's going to continue our species if I die? I mean, I don't even know if you two are guys or girls!"

A Luma was passing by Snow Cap Galaxy. Tired from his long trip, he decided that the planet looked like a nice rest stop. Besides, scouting for new materials for Rosalina's Comet Observatory could wait, couldn't it?

As the Luma landed on the snow-covered planet, he was warmly greeted by three bunnies.

"Wanna play?" asked the head bunny sweetly.

The Luma decided that he still had enough energy to play with these cute little bunnies.

"Sure," he replied.

"Let's play hide and seek!" said the bunny. "Can you catch us all in 150 seconds?"

The three bunnies darted off in different directions while the Luma covered his eyes. To very peppy music composed by the famous Earth alien Koji Kondo, the chase began.


	3. The Hunt is On

Chapter 2 (The Hunt is On)

The Luma quickly started dusting off the snow, searching for the bunnies. After 30 seconds, he found one. The bunny started running. The Luma tried to catch up to it, but he was so tired, and the bunny moved so fast. Eventually, 120 seconds passed, and the timer bell rang.

The three bunnies suddenly reappeared in front of the Luma. The Luma conceded defeat.

"Good game," the Luma said.

"This ain't no game," sneered the head bunny.

Immediately the bunnies lunged at the Luma, knocking him out stone cold. After much arguing, they bared their fangs and dug into the Luma's blood.

"Hey, this feels good," said Todd excitedly.

The bunnies, while sucking the Luma's blood, grew stars on their tails and their ears turned yellow. They also felt more agile. Eventually, the Luma's body dried up and it became a flat, shiny star. The bunnies decided to keep the star.

"I still don't see why we have to put up with that 150 second hide and go seek nonsense," complained Kim. "Why can't we just simply kill them on the spot?"

"Because," replied Todd impatiently. "We need our prey to be active enough before we eat them to stimulate their blood. Besides, our cute appearance throws off their guard."

"Yeah," said Leslie. "But that cutesy appearance leaves a bad taste in my mouth."

As the months passed, the bunnies waited for more unsuspecting travellers to pass by. They would follow the same routine to lure them into a sense of security, and then eat them. Of course, the sight of dead carcasses was not pleasant for their tiny planet, so they built snowmen over them.

Rosalina, awaiting the Luma's return for many months, was afraid. It seemed that many travellers to Snow Cap Galaxy never returned, and thus it was very dangerous. To protect others from a grisly fate on that planet, she assigned a Luma to guard the Launch Star, under the guise of requiring 1600 Star Bits to fill his hungry stomach, and made the warp only active after completing many challenges in the secret Garden room.


	4. Mario to the Rescue

Chapter 3 (Mario to the Rescue)

Mario was exhilarated. He had seen many wondrous and seemingly impossible sights in space in his latest adventure. He had surfed on a manta ray, slingshot into a giant spider, saved his brother, Luigi, from a haunted mansion, and defied the laws of physics more times than he could count. It was all very mind-boggling.

Having completed many challenges in the secret Garden room already (some which were dastardly dangerous), he was ready to take on the Garden's Hungry Luma. After feeding the Luma the requisite 1600 Star Bits, he was ready to warp to Snow Cap Galaxy.

"Oh, my tummy hurts so badly," moaned the Hungry Luma after Mario left. "I don't think I can even get near another Star Bit for days."

"Don't worry," said Rosalina. "You have done well."

"Ooh, a fat plumber is coming!" cried Leslie. "Imagine all that blood-drenched fat!"

"And he must be a slow runner too!" added Kim. "This should be easy prey."

Mario landed on the Toad Brigade's ship. Admiring the beauty of the Snow Cap planet, he excitedly got into the Launch Star and blasted his way onto the planet.

When he got there, three cute little bunnies greeted him. He recognized the friendly bunnies from the Gateway and Gold Leaf Galaxies. He knew that they would eagerly give him the star for Rosalina's Comet Observatory, but first he would have to catch them.

"Can you catch us all in 150 seconds?" said the head bunny.

Mario started running at the beginning of the peppy music. He found flip switches in the snow and activated all of them, opening the bunnies' secret stash of Fire Flowers. He picked up one of them and, having much experience with these items, melted the planet's snowmen.

A bunny popped out, running quickly away. Mario demonstrated his athletic prowess with long jumps and side spins while chasing the bunny. Eventually, he caught the bunny.

"Didn't expect this fat plumber to be so fast", thought Kim. "I hope the others can hold him off for another 60 seconds.

Mario suddenly realized that he indeed had little time left to catch the other bunnies, which had popped out during his chase. He kept running, but being extremely fast, the bunnies managed to continue outpacing him. Mario eventually realized that he could trap the bunnies in the metal holes on both sides on the planets, and tricked them into falling into them. However, it was too late.

"You need more practice," smirked the head bunny.

For Mario, he felt a twanging in his head, and everything went black.


	5. Luigi's Second Finest Hour

Chapter 4 (Luigi's Second Finest Hour)

Luigi was worried. His brother had not come back for a long time. Perhaps, he had finally been…no, that was not possible. But then again, he did get himself captured in that mansion. Man, did King Boo's insult still sting after all these years.

"Well, I'll show that tub of lard!" thought Luigi.

With that, he left the Toad Brigade's garage and prepared to head to Snow Cap Galaxy.

"Before you go," said Mail Toad. "Don't forget your mushrooms!"

Luigi ate his twenty mushrooms, which got him energized and ready to go. He jumped to the warp and flew away.

"Wow," said the Toad Brigade admiringly. "How can a skinny guy eat so many mushrooms and still be so energetic?"

"Geez," snapped Kim. "This is the meal we've been waiting for years ago. Why the heck do we have to keep it in storage?"

"Because," replied Todd. "Such meat and fat will have to last us for a long time. I mean, how do you know that we're going to have another piece of meat fall from the heavens in another few years?"

Just then, a green moustachioed plumber fell from the heavens. Unfortunately, to the bunnies,

"He's too skinny," whined Leslie. "Let's not waste our time on him."

"He's still meat," said Todd, getting very irritated. Now hurry up and bury fatso!"

Leslie and Kim very hastily shoved Mario into a metal cache.

Luigi was getting closer to Snow Cap Galaxy. He was scared. What if a huge Yeti took Mario?

When he landed, he met three bunnies. Maybe these cute little bunnies could help him find Mario.

"Okay," said the head bunny. "We'll help you find your friend, but first, can you catch us all in 150 seconds?"

The bunnies scattered in all directions and it was Luigi's turn to fail…er…attempt the bunny challenge. Luigi wobbled on the floating ice, which, coupled with his ACME Low-Fraction Sprint Shoes, caused him to fall.

"Heh, heh," muttered Todd. "If this keeps up, he'll be finished in no time."

Seventy seconds remained on the clock. So far, he had uncovered one of the bunnies, but it moved too fast to catch. He slipped and fell again on a flipswitch, the last one he needed to activate the metal rooms.

Luigi found the Fire Flower and started blasting away at the ice like a pyromaniac. This uncovered the last two bunnies, which scattered in all directions. He tried to chase them, but their speed overwhelmed him. However, one of the bunnies tripped and fell into the metal hole.

"Now if I could just get the other two in there," thought Luigi. "I can win this!"

He slowly went after the other two bunnies. Confused, they continued to hop away at a leisurely pace until they too fell into the hole. Ten seconds remained.

Luigi jumped into the hole and saw a fainted Mario.

"Mario?" he said incredulously.

Five seconds remained. Luigi chased the three bunnies in the hole and caught each one of them.

"Fine, you win," grumbled Todd. "Take the Star and your friend."

Mario woke up. He recalled having a bad dream about demon bunnies. Then he saw the Star.

"Quick," Mario called. "Get the Star, Luigi!"

Luigi captured the Star, one more in their quest to rejuvenate the Comet Observatory.

"I have come to save you, brother!" said Luigi. "You were out cold for a long time."

"I liked it better when you were the damsel in distress and I was the hero!" snapped Mario.

Everyone on the planet laughed, even the bunnies, despite losing their lunch.


	6. A Modest Proposal

Epilogue (A Modest Proposal)

Later, Rosalina landed on Snow Cap Galaxy, accompanied by the Gateway Galaxy bunnies and her second-in-command, Luma Black. She was protected by her ACME Anti-Presidential-Assassination Bubble.

"Hi," greeted Todd. "What do you want?"

"Would you like to move to the Comet Observatory?" asked Rosalina. "It's an intergalactic home for all the hitchhikers in the galaxy. I thought that you might want a home more comfortable than what you have now."

"And you'll never have to go hungry again!" beamed Luma Black.

Leslie and Kim's ears perked at the sound of this, and Todd too seemed interested.

"A peace offering from Gateway Galaxy," said one of the Gateway bunnies, offering a patch of Gateway grass.

The three bunnies rushed to eat the rich, nutrient-filled grass.

"Yuck!" screamed Todd. "You can keep your vegetables. We're staying!"

For once, Leslie and Kim agreed. It has been years since they ever ate anything besides Star Bits and meat, and this newfound taste came as a shock.

"Okay," replied Rosalina. "But, please consider it."

The party departed via Launch Star.

Arthur Dent was travelling through the universe. He saw Snow Cap Galaxy and thought it very cute-looking. It even had bunnies on it!

He landed on the planet, expecting to stay only for a few hours. But the greetings from the denizens almost surprised him. Almost, but he had seen far worse already.

"Hello," greeted the bunnies cutely. "Wanna play?"

The End?


End file.
